so the weed I found in my fridge is actually lettuce. tell jim I need that 5 bucks after all
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
There can only be one screw up per family and I was here first. Get your shit together bro
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
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