So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
My cleaning lady broke my bubbler. It's awkward between us now.
Why?
Because she knows I do drugs and I know she's a clumsy bitch.
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
For 15 minutes straight, he literally did every accent there was, from Russian to Bostonian. The issue: no one could determine whether he was sober, wasted, or anywhere in between
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
Randomize
