And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
I'm like connect-the-dots of drunk. Whiskey, bourbon, vodka, rum, gin. The hidden picture is me faceplanting.
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
Most awkward car ride ever. Kid in the front seat was bawling, 2 in the backseat were ready to fight, and I was giving the last kid a handie. This needs to stop happening to us.
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
