yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
He kept falling asleep with the pizza in his hand. I woke him up and told him and he was shocked because he thought he ate it all. Then he would end up falling asleep and we'd repeat the whole process again.
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
My dad's girlfriend is driving through the snow to bring me my purple haze. If he doesn't wife her up, we have a bigger issue on our hands.
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
I'm not fucking any of these fools. But if they want to buy me Olive Garden, that's their business.
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
My new gym is popular with trophy wives. They’re talking about yachts and plastic surgery
Learn their secrets! I want to meet men with Maseratis. The meat heads and Mustangs scene is getting old
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