He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
Life isn't about who you kiss, drunk, at midnight. It's who you text nonsense to, sober, from the toilet.
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
He's against "violent sex" cause apparently my body is "sacred". Like dude I'm about to tell you about blowing your brother just so you'll fuck me like an animal Jesus Christ....
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
Randomize
