Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
Just walk up to him nice, spread your legs like smooth peanut butter on toast and scream "LOOK AT MY BEAVER! LOOK AT IT!!"
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
Well, that was my first dog walk of shame. Nothing says "I've got my life together" like an inside out shirt and a baggie full of dog shit.
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
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