what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
just got permission to expense a nerf gun
I took an uber home at 6am. Went to Santanas, apparently they don't take american express. So the uber driver bought my burrito. Success!
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
Do you remember coming over and asking for toast and then singing that yeah toast song very loudly while you were dropping my bread all over my kitchen?
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
You were telling everyone in the bar that Jess gave you scurvy.
Randomize