how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
At the bar. Guy comes up wearing a hollister shirt and says "lets blow this popsicle stand"
You fucking left with him didn't you?!
its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
I walked into my house this morning to find an 18 pack on the counter. I think that's gods way of ringing the bell for round two.
we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
i was sitting in the back of a squad car completely stoned watching airplanes take off
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
I’M DRUNK AND EXCITED.
Found Ryan’s keys in the fridge. On my way back.
Also, tell him he missed Nathan passing out in the dryer.
Randomize
