You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
This morning I woke up in the entrance of a retirement home. Memory fragments from last night: making it rain with the contents of my wallet over the bridge, getting hit by a car, and a lot of running.
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
Randomize
