Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
I was just about to go down on her when she gave herself a "smell check" and said "no, not today".
The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
Have you ever eaten pizza and gotten your dick sucked at the same time? Because I have pizza.
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
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