I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
I'm drunk at the doctor. It's not that fun. Overrated in fact.
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
Only you could go on vacation to visit family and hook up with a pro NFL player from Tinder
Got home & pissed on my moms carpet like a bear in the woods. I woke up to a picture message with me passed out on the floor with my pants down & hands covering my face. I've had an awkward week
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
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