Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
I want to be a jewelry store heckler. "Hey man, is she really worth it"
we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
I just learned that your liver regrows itself every 2 months. Best news I've heard all week.
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
Two guys I banged regularly got married this week. I need vodka.
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
He showed up at my house drunk with a pizza and said he wanted to lazily finger me while I watched supernatural. Who was I to say no?
Randomize