So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
Found you in the bushes with fireworks, a teacup and no shoes. Decided it was a bad time to wake you.
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
tell her i changed her phone's unlock password to be the length of my fully erect penis in centimeters. I'll be in my room for the next two hours.
Dude... She just sent me a story of how she wants to fuck me on a boat and call me her captain.. Well ahoy mateys, lets set sail
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
After returning from the hospital with lock-jaw from getting tackle at the game. Some naked chick busted out of his room and hit him with a devastating haymaker to the jaw because he wouldn't have sex
Randomize
