My penis looks like a roll of pennies
Oh. Ok. I get the hint.
Like a roll of pennies where the paper got wet & then dried all wrinkly and weird...
I asked my mom if I was the drunkest one in the room. With 8 days till I go back to school, I couldn't care less about being shitfaced at a baptism
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
I'm about to take plan-b with a glass of wine and ramen noodles. I cannot decide who will hurt more...my vagina, my kidneys or my pride.
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize
