do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
This morning I got out of bed 4 HOURS LATE, made eggs with a plastic beach shovel, and then ate them using pens like chopsticks in my bed with my turtle. Obviously, I am not in the mood to be proactive with my life today...
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
I'm not coming to work today because tequila
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
Put viagra in his coffee. I did that with Geoff last month and three hours later I had bitten through a throw pillow and gotten a noise complaint from a neighbor
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
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