This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
Life is so much better when you know you're gonna get laid soon.
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
We will go to karaoke
Okay, well, i'm covered in paint, haven't showered & have already been drinking, so if I fall on the floor in a blaze of depeche mode & beer tears, you can't pretend you don't know me
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
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