So right when I was pulling her underwear off with my teeth, she told me, "Stick your penis in my 'nanners." Needless to say, there was no penis-'nanner interaction.
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
i just got drunk and created an entire Dr Seuss unit for my first graders.
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
Just watched a guy open his car door, puke, close it, and resume driving. Happy Monday.
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
