: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
I think I may have appendicitis, but the house is like two blocks from the hospital so I'm just gonna go and drink anyway.
Currently microwaving whipped cream to make white Russians and hotboxing the kitchen while this random kid is dancing in the corner.
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
He sent me a picture of his ass and said the backdoor is open. Almost grabbed my keys and a condom before I saw it was a group text. Not nearly drunk enough for his desperation.
I walked into the kitchen and twelve of them were just staring at the oven. Freshmen are the weirdest drunks ever.
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
I have a new favorite bar game. It's called, get dressed up and go drinking alone then make up random stories of why you are alone to look less like an alc
You set fire to his cat.
In my defense, I did not think it would be in the trash bag.
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
Randomize
