What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
I damn near set my vagina on fire. WHILE The Flaming Lips played in the background. Intensely apropos.
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
Randomize