I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
my dad just asked me if my booty call guy that comes over at 3am and leaves at 6 would like to stay for sunday brunch next week. you in?
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
I'm in jersey with marbles.. He's blasted about to fuck a manatee and his entire family is trying to stop it. His mother punched me in the chest for not trying hard enough
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
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