Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
I'm in the laundromat a drunk armenian guy keeps trying to help me fold my laundry. Ah i'm going to miss queens.
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
That awkward moment when you realize you've been secretly blackout dating someone for three months. Drunk me is in a committed relationship.
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
Randomize
