So I have to go swallow an entire zebra. Ur on ur own girl.
I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
so that guy from last night texted me saying i flashed half of my extended family last night. so classy.
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
She pulled a wad of lint out of my bellybutton while she was blowing me. Said she's never seen anything like it. I've never gone soft so fast.
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
I'm going to give blood tomorrow. Prepare yourself for pictures and a cynical poem about the heart and its level of tangibility.
He put his name in my phone as David Hot Guy With Tattoos and I fell in love because that's what I was going to change his name to anyways
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
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