I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
so i was sitting on this guys lap, and we were flirting and everything right..well his phone kept ringing, turns out it was his pregnant wife...she had gone into labor..
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
Considering the fact that you wouldn't give me my cat last night because he was "destined for broadway", yeah, I'm accusing you of stealing him
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
i'm going as a slutty football player, and all night i'll drunkily whisper "id love to catch your balls." into random strangers ears.
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
Randomize
