so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
Good thing you didnt wake up last night. Wouldve found me naked talking to my closet asking to borrow my towel.
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
Yeah..I guess you know your hair looks like shit when TSA asks to inspect it
I have seriously seen way too may DIY cut off jean booty shorts and half shirts on fat girls this summer. Fuck you Pinterest.
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
Enjoy the penises
Randomize
