garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
Eating hibachi. The chef is squirting sake into my mouth with a ketchup bottle. Happened twice, more to come.
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
I told him to take the baby so I could work out. My workout consisted of getting high and masturbating
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
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