I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
im just glad that if you were going to have awkward hospital sex, you would want it with me
Well someone named our apartment "the eiffel tower" on facebook check-in so I think they know..
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
There is a moment when you wake up with a butt plug in when you question your choices in life.
There is also a moment when you wake up in a kiddie pool of jello cubes where you question what the fuck you did last night. Are you still in the attic or did you go home.
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
Randomize
