i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
So the next time I call you and say I'm going to my first strip club because it's christmas eve eve, and have work the next morning, I'd appreciate you stopping me
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
Randomize
