I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?
Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
There is not enough soap in the world to make me feel clean after last night. Im gonna need jesus for this one
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
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