it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
Missing both credit cards and just had a flashback of grinding my nuts on the terrified cab driver for amusement. i am feeling a slight hate for myself right now.
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
I have two bottles of emergency tequila stashed under my desk at work.
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
Randomize
