He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
I just lost $50 at the races, got drunk, and woke up to my ex-gf. Apparently the good decisions kept on rolling...
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
Mom chose Thanksgiving to tell me the reason I am here is because she was too tired to give my dad a BJ and too drunk to make him pull out.
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
Like I actually don't feel all that great but the fact that I'm not projectile vomiting at work makes life seem so magical
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
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