omg this kid i'm babysitting is making a penis out of playdough ahhhh.
He just rolled me a 'baby penis' as opposed to his 'big boy' penis that he crafted...he just demanded that I roll him a penis.
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
Bro, it was an EPIC night once again last night. I’m so sorry that you saw me naked.
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
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