And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
Apparently married women at the office don't like getting congratulated on getting "knocked up"
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
okay i am so sorry that i pulled a knife on you last night but seriously that woman knows how to throw a party.
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
The waitress at the airport bar just asked me if I wanted a "to go" beer, hahahahaha OF COURSE I WANT A TO GO BEER.
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
Randomize
