I did something stupid with eggs call me when you get up. Cops were also involved.
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
Everything was going great until my fake mustache fell off when we started making out.
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
Randomize
