Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
I needed to borrow my dads nail clippers and next to it was an industrial size box of condoms if that wasnt bad enough I dropped the clippers behind the bed and discovered hundreds of used condoms
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
he said he has something really important to tell me but isn't ready yet. It's either that he loves me or has herpes
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
So essentially hes paying me $150k/year for the rest of his career to not have sex
SERIOUSLY? WTF! why cant I find a super hot, super gay, super conservative christian NFL player in need of a beard?
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
Did I tell you about my dream that I got handed a $100 and my vagina dissolved it? I think it wants me to not be a whore anymore.
Should I put the spider I likely swallowed in my sleep into my calorie tracker?
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize
