That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
Did you leave a blizzard on my porch last night? Or was that someone else giving out a metaphorical threat to me?
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
I'm like a walking PSA for tequila shots
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
I love that my family celebrates every holiday with a joint. Chanukah? Mazel-juana! Easter? What's more spring than the color green? Election day? What better way to celebrate democracy in action than medical pot?
I bet he’d be surprised by the epic blow job he’d get if he stopped talking about his wife long enough for me to get in the mood
Randomize
