Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
He made a fake guest pass that was just a note card with "I'm here. Me." written in sharpie, and tried to convince the security guard it was real.
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
My dad's girlfriend is driving through the snow to bring me my purple haze. If he doesn't wife her up, we have a bigger issue on our hands.
I started the day with dreams of getting laid and ended it with the reality of eating Taco Bell in my bed with my dog.
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize
