i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
I'm not crazy, I only keep calling you cause you won't pick up.
I think I sharted a yagerbomb.
that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
Confidence is key. All I had to tell him is I'm drinking a bottle of wine and eating chocolate today to celebrate that I love myself. That's how you get a Valentine, my friend.
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
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