it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
anyone who says 'i love you' and then followed by 'im going to call the cops if you touch me' doesnt really mean the first part fyi
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
Fair warning: I will be throwing corn dogs at you every time I see you this week.
By 9 pm this evening I'll have accomplished smashing with two different guys in two different time zones in the same day.
Stay hydrated
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
Randomize
