do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
Also, there's the possibility of falling 5 feet to your death to make it more exciting
In which case I will yell FIVE SECOND RULE and continue to slam you
The "don't have sex with him again" alerts you set on my phone just started going off.
Good. "Seriously, don't do it" should start in about five minutes.
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
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