walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
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