Uh i was pretty wasted sat, so if i was weird it wasnt me. It was just vodka bein weird w my phone
Tonite tequila might call you
Be prepared
she was pretty much dry humping my leg when her boyfriend walked in. he says "you should probably leave." all i could come up with was "YEAH, I KNOW!"
I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
Randomize
