Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
The words "my birth control fell out" should never be spoken
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
First time at a gay bar. I found a surrogate AND sperm donor! The surrogate is straight, so it evens out.
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
Buying a pregnancy test at Walmart in the middle of the night in the middle of Tennessee is not really how I imagined my 25th year on this planet starting out...
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
Randomize
