Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
was stoked on phone sex until he started reciting lines from star wars
Girls behind me in the library are trying to outslut each other with stories from last semester. I'm about to set my cock on the table between them and label it "tie breaker"
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
Your remote is drenched in lotion and you expect me to believe you weren't masturbating?!
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
It's definitively the wine. Every time I can drink and work I feel like I win at the game of life.
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
I used the line "you don't have enough pillows". Then left. Thought you should know.
As I was blowing him, he proceeded to tell me that his friend who I blew years ago gave me a five star review on my BJ skills. And, he agrees.
Atta girl.
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
I don’t care if there’s a pandemic. My husband gave me a hall pass for my 40th birthday and I’m going to use it!
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
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