you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog
do you not see the irony in that??
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
turns out my ex girlfriend has become my most successful wingman. life is fuckin weird sometimes
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
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