Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
The stripper told me she had been working there for eight years, then got mad when I asked if she was trying to make it into mangment. Awkwardest lap dance
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
if you spike my cofee one more time im gona fuck you up. im presenting to the mayor in sevven fucking minuets. fuck you and youir fucking bartending classses i am so fuckign fcked
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
Btw, remind me to tell you about how I had to cancel my crazy wild sex plans with Will b/c my roommate came back from his trip after a day b/c Canada wouldn't let him in. Fucking cockblock.
Actually that's the whole story. You don't have to remind me.
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
Nothing says girls night like wine cheese and pregnancy tests 😂
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