dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
Boys can't fool me. I know "want to come up and meet my dogs?" is just a nondirect way of saying "come up and meet my penis".
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
The lady at Walgreens was all excited my pregnancy tests had a coupon.
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
Randomize