I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
nothing like going to the bathroom, running into the wall, thinking its a person and saying"its ok i just had the 4 beers" even the wall knew i was lying
"I vaguely remember the Health and Safety Inspector walking into my room this morning while I was passed out naked. That's one way to get it over with quickly."
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
I just tried to pass the bowl to my dog for 2 minutes before I remembered she isn't human. It is 7:27 am.
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
It's official: I now only own one pair of jeans that I haven't blown the crotch out of. It might be time to put a stop to red wine Wednesdays.
You mean, in addition to red wine every-fucking-days?
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
Randomize
