Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
I feel like there should be a 'roommate information section' of the paperwork when there's a chance you'll be given pain killers.
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
Fuck this. I'm adopting 12 cats and naming them after the 12 disciples. Maybe Jesus will have sympathy for me then.
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
Randomize
