I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
Judging by the fact that he asked me if i wanted to serenade him using cocaine and Taylor Swift I'd say I so have it in the bag.
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
It's like that thing with the devil and the angel except one shoulder has orgasms and the other has stuffed crust pizza and depression.
My ass is underappreciated
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
Randomize
