I hope I'm pregnant just to spite you.
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
You're in a tuxedo, you can pee wherever you want.
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
Successfully defrauded the county government. What have you done today?
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
Randomize
